Thursday, September 03, 2009

My friend died today :(

My friend LisaP died today, at 12:30pm, with her husband and best friend (and possibly her pugs) by her side. I was lucky enough to meet her twice, in Westport and in Philly. I love her so much, and I'm so sad that she's gone.

Lisa was very active on the support boards I'm on; she was never afraid to speak her mind but she always did so with grace, sensitivity, and well-chosen words. We bonded, a bit, because we'd had some similar experiences, and she was definitely the better person between us. Her pugs were the only children she had and she loved them very much; one had a birthday recently and she got herself up and made the pugs corn muffins with peanut butter frosting. That's what they liked for birthday celebrations and so that's what she did. She surrounded herself with music and butterflies and creativity and beauty.

Lisa received hospice care starting in June, because she could no longer receive chemo. Her mets were kind of everywhere but it was the liver mets that were giving her trouble. She managed to last for weeks and weeks, eating just a little, sleeping a lot, and getting continual oxygen. Her husband slept near her so that he could lift her out of bed when she needed to be out.

She and her husband wrote about everything in a blog they were publishing. Nothing was kept secret, so that we all knew what was happening and how her life was winding down. A few weeks ago she was able to check into our mets-only board - we were so happy to see her! - and there, too, she told us what it was like, being her and living the life she was living then. She was so

She was so beautiful, inside and out, and I miss her so much. I can't stop crying because Lisa is gone - even though we knew it would happen, it still hurts so much. I hope she is resting comfortably now, surrounded by beauty, rainbows, and pugs. Love to you, Lisa... and to Lisa's family, who also loved her very much.

And to cancer: Fuck you. Stop killing my friends.


Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear of your friend's passing. Makes me sad. Be strong.

Anonymous said...

There is never the right words to try to express how you are feeling when some one of such beauty is cruely taken, live each day for yourself and for your dear friend.x

manchester fat acceptance said...

Gingeyginge, thank you for saying what i was feeling, but so much more beautifully than i could have put it.

sister, i wish this would stop, and that all of your friends would get better, and that you would get better too.

i'm glad that she had you for a friend while she was alive, as it sounds like there was a strong connection there.