An eventful Monday

I'm sure you all were wondering why I didn't post an update with my endoscopy results since I was supposed to be seeing that doctor for the follow-up visit on Monday June 19. As it happened, I didn't see the gastroenterologist that day because I needed to see my optometrist.

A couple of weeks ago, tree-like floaters suddenly appeared in my right eye. The tree structure collapsed and became much smaller over the course of the day and then disappeared. Since I had no other visual disturbances I figured that my eyes were ok. Then last Friday, a new (and rather annoying) floater that looked like a string curved into a partial circle appeared in my right eye. Later that evening I briefly saw some arcs of light in that eye when I moved my eyes around.

Since my vision was otherwise unaffected (there were no shadows, blurring, or decreasing vision in any way), there was only the one floater and not a bunch of them and it didn't block my vision (even if it was crazy annoying), and the arcs of light were connected to moving my eyes and they stopped, I didn't think I needed to go to an emergency room but would call my optometrist on Monday. Had any of those other things been going on  - or if any of them had started - I would have seen someone immediately because they're symptoms of retinal detachment.

I did call my optometrist's office on Monday morning and they squeezed me in to see the other optometrist in the office. I said I was supposed to go to another appointment and they told me that if I didn't go into their office that I needed to see my family doctor today and get a referral to an ophthalmologist today. I ended up rescheduling my gastroenterologist appointment for August 3 and going in to see the optometrist.

There, my pupils were dilated and my retinas examined. The big concern, and the reason they wanted me examined right away, was the possibility that my retina was detaching. Fortunately, that's not what is happening. Instead, I have posterior vitreous detachment, or PVD, which happens when the jelly-like fluid in the eye (the vitreous) detaches from the retina. It's normal and happens in older eyes. The big risk is that it could make the retina detach, too, so if I see a sudden increase in the number of floaters or any kind of shadow over my vision, I'm to see the optometrist or go to the emergency room immediately. Otherwise I'll see the optometrist in August for a follow-up.

Was I foolish to not head to the ER right away? Maybe. But I was fairly certain that I wasn't experiencing a retinal detachment as those symptoms are very well known and I didn't have them. I wouldn't have waited longer than a couple of days before seeing someone but I figured that waiting the extra days (in the absence of any new symptoms) would be all right.

And as it happens, I got the endoscopy results from my oncologist when I saw her on June 9. I didn't talk about those results as well because the gastroenterologist will need to interpret the results. Since I won't see him for another six weeks, I can tell you that the endoscopy showed....

Nothing. There's no ulcer. There's no damage. Te biopsies were normal. I am not gluten-intolerant. I do not have an H. pylori infection.

There's nothing wrong at all with my stomach. Why does it hurt sometimes? I have no idea. Maybe it's all in my head?

Bone scan day

It's been long enough since the radiation treatment that any we should be able to tell whether or not the treatment actually worked. The way to do that is via a bone scan, which I had this morning.

The scan is in two parts: the injection of a radioactive tracer that settles in the bones and is excreted through the urine, and the scan itself, where a machine detects how much of the tracer has been absorbed into each part of each bone. Any areas where there's either additional or less tracer are areas of interest. Sometimes those areas are non-cancer related (for example, the scan picks up my arthritis and the degeneration I have in my lower back) but we'll be paying special attention to the sternum.

I lie flat on my back on a table for the scan. This time they did three passes of the scanner: one from head to toe parallel to me and directly above and below me, one at about a 30 degree angle to my chest, and one that spiraled around my chest. The actual scan took about 45 minutes and then I was done!

I see my oncologist for the results in a week, on June 9. I expect the results to be good.

That was the endoscopy

This afternoon I had the endoscopy to see what shape my stomach is in. I think it went well.

Ian drove me there and back because I was sedated and I wasn't allowed to drive myself or take a taxi. He took Gozer for a walk while he was waiting for me.

When I got there, I had to wait a bit for them to call me in but once I was called into the back things went quickly. They had me change out of my long-sleeved top into a gown. The nurse came back, asked me a bunch of questions, and put a blood pressure cuff on me.

And then the nurse tried to start an IV for the sedative. For whatever reason she wanted to use my hand, and I hadn't been allowed to eat or drink anything for over four hours before so I was slightly dehydrated, and my veins are pretty crappy as it is. The IV attempt did not go well and I'm going to be left with a giant bruise.

She decided that she wasn't going to try again and that she'd leave my IV for the endoscopy nurse. That nurse did a much better job with the IV: she got it on the first try and it didn't hurt quite so much. Putting an IV into the hand is always going to hurt a little.

Then another nurse confirmed my name and age. The doctor sprayed a banana-flavoured numbing agent on my throat, gave me a thing to protect my teeth, and started injecting the sedative.

And then I woke up. I remember absolutely nothing of the procedure and I'm ok with that.

I have a followup appointment for June 19, I think. I'm not sure... I was pretty woozy when the nurse told me but it's written on a card. I slept for about half of the drive and then for about an hour after I got home. I'm still pretty tired but feeling ok.

Hopefully the doctor will have got some good biopsies and will have some information for me.

My eyes

Did I mention that I was seeing a new optometrist? My previous optometrist was fairly far away and was always, always running late. My new optometrist is much closer and is on time. Plus they do more tests there, including a visual field test and optical coherence tomography, a test that measures the retinal nerve fiber layer. I see my optometrist every six months in part because my prescription is so high.

One thing this optometrist has discovered is that my eye pressure (the technical term is intraocular pressure) is also high. On the automatic test, my eyes register a pressure of about 25 (12-22 is apparently normal), and on the manual test, my eyes register a pressure of about 22. My optometrist says that my eyes are deep-set and so they don't register properly on the automatic test, giving a higher-than-normal reading, but my eye pressure is still at the high end of normal during the manual test.

We've done the optical coherence tomography each of the three times I've been to this optometrist and the results have been unchanged in the year and a half. This is good: high eye pressure can mean glaucoma, but the retinal nerve fiber layer doesn't show any glaucoma. Therefore, my optometrist has diagnosed me with ocular hypertension (high eye pressure).

My optometrist and I talked it over and we've decided not to treat the ocular hypertension right now but to just watch it. I'll continue going in every six months and if the pressure gets any higher or the retinal nerve fiber layer shows any changes, we'll treat it then.

So that's two new things going on: my stomach issues (which flared up again last night and today) and this ocular hypertension. Lucky me.

Finally did the scans the doctor ordered

For years I'd put off doing the pelvic ultrasound that my doctor ordered for me. I'd also put off doing the bloodwork he ordered for me. But when I last saw him a couple of months ago, I committed to him that I'd do all my tests before we left for our trip. Last week I finally got both tests done.

I had the pelvic ultrasound along with the bone density scan he more recently ordered, on Friday. I had to have both the "internal" (aka transvaginal) and "external" ultrasounds done. Usually they start with the external one because the bladder has to be full but somehow mine wasn't so we started with the internal one. Blech. Then I went for my bone density scan and finished with the regular pelvic ultrasound.

The technician who did my ultrasounds was weird. She kept asking why I was having the scan done and didn't seem to understand that it was because I'm 45 and still have a uterus that should be checked once in a while. During the first part she asked me if anyone had ever said anything about the shape of my uterus. Ummm, no. For some reason she thought it was wider at the top than usual (still within normal parameters) but when she did the second ultrasound it was normal. I hope she's not the one reading the scans.

At least the scans and tests are done and I don't have to do them again for a long time. The bone density is super-easy but pelvic ultrasounds - both parts - aren't fun for me. My bladder usually gets overfull and I find the both exams extremely uncomfortable. I know that the internal exam gives a clearer picture but I find it invasive. I wish there was another way to get the same detail with a scan that wasn't quite so intimate.

Various appointments

Last Friday was my bone scan. The injection went smoothly and so did the scan even though I was an hour late for the scan. I have no idea how that happened; for whatever reason, even though I knew exactly what time the second appointment was supposed to happen, my brain added an hour to that time. And even though I showed up exactly an hour late, it was another twenty-five minutes before they came and got me. I didn't know that they were looking for me so I was just waiting for the nurse. Fortunately, the scan is still valid. 

Today was mammogram day, which also went smoothly. Because the morphea has deformed the left breast so much, the technician couldn't get a good view of the scars on the mammogram. Breast cancer often comes back in previous scar tissue so it's important to get a good view of my old scars. So they did an ultrasound of the scars, which was apparently quite difficult as the first scar is big and meanders a bit.

My CT scan is scheduled for next Friday and I get the results from all these scans on December 14.

We also had our physical exams with our family doctor on Tuesday. Both our cholesterol numbers are down to more acceptable levels so our diet (and Ian's pills) are working. Yay! My family doctor also asked how I was doing. I'm doing fine - well, better - and I told him that my psychologist and I had thought that volunteer work would be good for me and that I was thinking of looking for some volunteer work in the new year (depending on my test results, of course). My family doctor doesn't like the idea at all because he doesn't want me to get too stressed. I told him that understood that but that I was looking for meaning in my life.

His reply to that was that I should get meaning out of my relationship with Ian, that giving to other people is good but my relationships are the most important things I have. That's true, I guess, but afterwards I felt like I had traveled back in time to the 1950s and was being told to support my husband in his career. 

I know that I need to be careful with doing volunteer work; I tend to have an all-or-nothing approach to things that can be overwhelming. And I know that while the cancer is one reason why I haven't been working these last six years, another reason - perhaps the main reason - I haven't been working is my struggle with depression. I guess you could say that I'm mentally ill. I know that I will never again be the person I was when I was working (and that's a good thing in many ways), but I'd like to think that I can aspire to more than making Ian happy and focusing on our relationship. It's frustrating to be told otherwise.

Yesterday's biopsy

Yesterday was biopsy day for me. Ian took the day off so that he could do the driving which I appreciated. I could have driven myself there an back because it was just a skin biopsy but biopsies of any kind are stressful and it's better for me (and everyone I guess) to not drive when I'm stressed.

We didn't want to leave Gozer crated in her kennel for the whole time we were gone so we decided to bring her with us and take her to his parent's house for a visit. I'd hoped that Gozer could visit with Ian's parents because they like her and she likes them but she spent most of the time looking out of the patio doors. Ian's parents get a lot of chipmunks, squirrels, and bunnies - not just fully-growed versions but baby-sized versions too! - and Gozer likes to watch them go by and bark at them when they get too close.

After dropping off Gozer, we went to the hospital for the biopsy. It wasn't busy at all in that department and I got in right away. My surgeon looked at the affected breast and noticed that the reddened, thickened areas had changed since he saw me last week. Yep, it's changed, because it really done change that quickly. He injected local anaesthetic in two locations (the slower that stuff goes in the less it hurts), waited a minute, sliced off a skin sample, and stitched it closed with one stitch. Even though I couldn't feel what was happening and it didn't hurt at all, I could feel the whole breast move and that creeped me out a little bit. Fortunately, the whole thing didn't take long so I didn't end up freaking out too much.

The area bled a little bit for the next 24 hours or so but it seems to have dried up completely now. I haven't had any pain at the incision site although I have had some pain and throbbing in the areola today. I think I'll live :)

I'm to call the surgeon's office on Monday to request an appointment on Monday, June 11. My surgeon will remove the stitch at that appointment and check how well the incision is healing. If the pathology results are back, we'll talk about them at that appointment; otherwise, he'll call me with the result.

Scannng time

It's scanning season again. I had a neck-to-pelvis CT scan yesterday and the bone scan today. I'm not at all worried about these scans because my markers are so low but having annual scans gives me peace of mind. My first oncologist only wanted to schedule scans for me when I had symptoms. I find that approach very stressful because it means that I have to watch the symptoms carefully and decide whether or not the symptoms warrant a scan.

Having an annual scan means that if I did have new symptoms, my oncologist and I have the option of determining whether or not I think I want to have a scan before my regularly scheduled scan. There's something about knowing that a scan will be coming up that relaxes me and allows me to not freak out at every new twinge or ache - knowing that the symptoms will be scanned in the future means that I don't have to think about those symptoms now if there's no reason to worry. If there's something to the symptoms, then that will be picked up in the future scans.

If I didn't have a scan in my future then I need to spend time thinking about whether it's worth doing the scan now. I'd almost certainly build up the importance of the symptom and I'd convince myself that I need the scan RIGHT NOW.

So, even though I'm quite certain that nothing will show up in the scans, I'm happy to have them.

Speaking of oncologists, the cancer center has me listed as a patient of this new, substitute oncologist. I don't know if I was properly transferred or if I'm her patient because I'll be having a third appointment with her on Friday, May 4 to get the scan results. I liked my previous oncologist - the second one - a lot, and certainly much more than my first oncologist, and while I do like this third oncologist, I wish that there had been a process of some kind to transfer me from one oncologist to the other. I feel like I'm neither here nor there and I don't like that. Since the center considers me the third oncologist's patient, I'll talk to her about getting some clarification when I see her for my scan results.

Bone scan day

It was bone scan day today. This is the exam where they inject me with a radioactive tracer that settles into my bones, wait three hours, and then run something like a geiger counter over my entire body to see if there are any areas where the bone is being built up or eaten away. Close-up exams can be taken also.

Each time I have one of these exams, I wonder if maybe the radioactive tracer will give me superhero powers. So far that hasn't happened, and I'm starting to wonder if I need a catalyst like lightning to make the tracer activate my superhero powers. If only I'd had my bone scan during that big storm this past Wednesday I could have superhero powers now!

The scan itself went well. They did two close-up scans in addition to the full scan: one on the left side that was centered on my sternum and another one on my right centered on my lower ribs. I know they did extra scans last year but I don't remember whether there were two or one extra.

I dozed through the entire scan. I actually prefer to doze through it because otherwise I can get wiggly (I'm not supposed to move during the scan) and sometimes I can get a bit claustrophobic with the scanner sitting right above my nose during that part. If I can relax enough to doze, I stay (mostly) still and I'm not claustrophobic.

I see my oncologist in about a month and I'll get the results then. I guess she'll call me if anything shows up but I'm just going to assume that the results are fine until I hear otherwise.

Post-endoscopy day

For some reason I thought I would sleep well last night even though I slept for most of the evening. Silly me. Even though I felt exhausted, I had a really hard time sleeping deeply and I woke up a lot through the evening. Needless to say, I've been really tired all day and haven't felt like doing anything.

My throat is quite a bit sorer today than it was yesterday, I've felt nauseous off and on all day, and for some reason my face broke out in several different places. I have no idea how or why that happened, but I have bumps and tender spots all over my face.

I know I'm a bit whiny and cranky and that's because I don't feel my best and I'm super-tired. It'll definitely be an early bedtime for me.

Endoscopy

While the endoscopy/gastroscopy isn't the most fun test in the world, it's not the worst, either. The preparation was easy: all I had to do was not eat or drink anything after midnight last night. The doctor came in a bit late so I ended up having a little nap while I was waiting (and when I wasn't listening to the guy next to me talk on his cell phone. Grrr).

Although the test isn't painful, normally they give patients fentanyl together with Versed to semi-sedate the patient and help them relax through the five- or ten-minute procedure. Because I'm already on a fairly high dose of fentanyl, we decided that it wouldn't be a good idea to give me more of it. Apparently a few patients this week had received a bit too much fentanyl as they had to give them an anti-opiate.

They also gave me oxygen through a nose tubing thing, probably because a person's respiration is shallower and so the blood oxygen level goes down with the fentanyl. My breathing is always a bit shallow and my oxygen is always a touch low. It isn't a big deal except after surgery, when my oxygen goes too low and they tell me to take deep breaths to bring it up. Having to do that interrupts my sleeping.

They said that I might feel like I was choking or that I couldn't breathe during the test, and to remember that I could breathe. They also said that it might hit my gag reflex. Well, I definitely didn't feel like I was choking, and they did hit my gag reflex. In fact, I spent most of the time gagging which was uncomfortable. Thankfully, the test was short and I don't remember it too clearly because of the Versed.

After it was over I slept for an hour or so and then walked out on my own two feets. I got myself a coffee and something to eat, Ian drove me home, and I napped most of the evening. They told me that I would be too tired to go to my metalsmithing class and they were right.

I'm left with a bit of a sore throat and some lingering tiredness. He didn't see anything unusual although he took a few biopsies of my stomach. He has no idea what is causing the pain and he's given me a prescription to take for the next six weeks or so. I forget what he gave me because the prescription is in my purse which is way over there and I'm too tired to go and look at it.

I'm looking forward to having a good long sleep and feeling refreshed tomorrow.

CT scan day

You know how you can tell that Ian's away? I eat an entire 500mL carton of Haagen-Dazs ice cream straight from the carton in one sitting.... which is what I did this afternoon. You see, when Ian's home we usually buy frozen yogourt, which has about half the calories as the Haagen-Dazs, and we share it. We also serve the ice cream into bowls and don't eat it directly from the carton. I tell you, I'm a wild woman!

It isn't just that Ian's not home which has prompted me to eat this ice cream. I had my regular CT scan this morning which examines my chest, abdomen, and pelvis for any signs that the cancer has spread to new places. I've been having some new pains in my sternum that feel like they're on the other side as the mets that had given me pain before. I've also got something weird pains in my right abdomen.

Now, I don't really think that the cancer has gone anywhere or that my pains mean much. I've had pains at various points in my colon for a long time and I expect that the pain I'm feeling is coming from there. The pain in my sternum is probably related to the existing mets there somehow. One explanation is that I've been on this level of pain medication for quite a long time and so it isn't as effective as it used to be because I've developed a tolerance to it.

The fact that I have perfectly reasonable explanations for these new pains doesn't mean that I'm not worried about them... only that I'm not freaking out. If I hadn't had the CT scan this morning I'd have called my oncologist in about a week. I did mention them to the technician so they'll take a closer look at those areas when they read my scans. This way, when I get the clear report I'll be confident that they didn't miss anything.

My oncologist doesn't typically call me with good results. If I were to get bad results she'd want me to come in and discuss them with her. If she'd been calling me to tell me results, then I'd freak out if she called me and didn't give me the results or if she didn't call me - I'd be sure that they were bad and I'd worry more. I've seen that happen with other people, where they get really upset when the oncologist doesn't call them with results and then it turns out later that the oncologist was out or sick or something. That's a whole lot of worrying for no good reason.

If I really want the results I can call for them in about a week. I'm not that anxious to get them so if I don't hear from my oncologist by mid-next week I'll assume that they're good and I'll get the full report when I see her next in a month or so. Until the "deadline" for her calling me has passed, however, I'll be a little anxious and may need to eat more ice cream. It's a good thing that I bought more today because that first carton is gone. :)

Squish, squish

I had my annual mammogram today. Even though I have stage iv breast cancer with my sternal mets, I have what my oncologist considers minimal mets because only one bone is affected. My oncologist figures that if the cancer were to show up in the breast again, it would be worth treating the breast as if I didn't have mets because treating the breast would reduce the amount of cancer in my body. So one of my annual scans is a mammogram.

Today's mammogram was the least painful I've had. In past years they've squished my boobs really hard and it's been a bit painful, but this year it was painless. Then again, she had me approach the machine differently: instead of standing right against the machine, she had me stand further back and lean in, which I think probably gave a better picture.

As far as tests go, the mammogram is pretty easy to do. There's nothing to drink and no eating restrictions and you don't have to be still for very long. I wish all my scans were this simple!

Progress is being made

Today I managed to get some packing done - yay! I thought that it would be really hard to pack the surfaces in my sewing room because they were a mess but once I started, it wasn't so bad. It took some time to sort things together but it turns out that there were few types of things than I thought there were. Really, there were only unfinished projects, commercial patterns, patterns I've traced, and notions on those surfaces. I'm by no means finished packing that area but I made good progress today.

This evening I went for coffee and a yummy dessert with a friend of mine. I don't get to see her as often as I'd like to because we both have lives but I always enjoy our visits. We tried to go to a new pastry shop but it closed too early, so we'll try that place another time.

Tomorrow I have my echocardiogram appointment. The respirologist wants me to have this test done to be sure that I don't have sarcoidosis in my heart. I'm quite certain that I don't have anything wrong with my heart and that there's no sarcoidosis there but it doesn't hurt to be sure. I had an echocardiogram before my very first chemotherapy back when I had my primary cancer in 2000 and it was no big deal. Back then I had to have it done to make sure that my heart was strong enough for that chemo as it was/is known to cause heart damage. As I remember, the test was no big deal.

I wish the echocardiogram was earlier in the day so that I could do that and then come back and pack but the appointment is for 3:30pm, which means that I'll need to try and pack earlier in the day. But if I do that, when will I get to watch all my recorded tv shows? :)

Bone scan day

Today was bone scan day. I got the radioactive tracer injection just before noon and then I had the scan itself at around 3pm. In between, I donated those eight bags of clothes to Goodwill and did some shopping. All of that took much less time than I had so I kind of wandered around and tried to stay out of the sun. It's really hot and humid here and when I was in the direct sun with no breeze, it was awful.

I think the weather is supposed to break on Thursday night or Friday because it looks like the high will be below 30C on Friday. I hope that's true because heat makes me sleepy.

Because I've had a bit of pain in one of my rigs, they took close-up scans of my ribs as well as the overall scan. My oncologist will call me if there's anything to report. She's pretty good about watching for the results (unlike the nurses and support staff) and I'm confident that if I don't hear from her within a week or two then I can assume that the scan was fine. I do expect the scan to be fine, of course, but I always worry a little bit. Everyone does.

Another big walking day

The cancer clinic called today with my bone scan appointment. It's scheduled for next Tuesday. The timing for the call and the appointment are consistent with the order for the scan going in this week and not last week when I saw my oncologist. Sigh. At least I have the appointment now.

Again, this isn't a big rush or anything because it's just a routine scan. I just wanted it to be scheduled.

Speaking of scans, I need copies of all my chest Xray and CT scans for the respirologist's appointment next Thursday. I picked those up today and of course I looked at all of them when I got home. I had to check and make sure that each disk works, right? The fact that I love looking at scans of myself had nothing to do with it. :)

The CT scans are cool. Some of them are from my neck to pelvis, some are from side-to-side, and others are front-to-back. Honestly, I don't know how anyone can see anything in these images. I know in the last one they'd seen some enlarged mediastinal lymph nodes but I couldn't find them. It was interesting to see where my port thingy goes. I thought that the tube was attached to a vein in my neck but it just bends there and ends up somewhere in my heart. Seeing that bend in the tube, I understand why certain neck positions result in a better blood flow than others.

Once I picked up my disks from the hospital, I decided I'd walk home. I took the bus there but it was such a beautiful afternoon that I wanted to enjoy it. That walk is about an hour and a half which is well within my current capabilities. What a long way I've come! At the beginning of summer I couldn't even walk 45 minutes without having to stop, and now I do huge walks two days in a row!

Halfway through the walk home, I stopped and got myself a yummy ice cream (vanilla ice cream flavour with a double scoop of oreo cookies) from Marble Slab. I discovered that the large cone, with 10oz of ice cream, is delicious but too big. Of course I finished the whole thing anyways - I'm not going to let something that good go to waste - but I haven't eaten anything since. That was definitely my idea of a yummy supper.

One busy day

I'm so looking forward to moving into our new house for many, many reasons, but right now I'm most looking forward to living with central air conditioning. We don't have it; all we have is a portable unit in the bedroom. It was super-warm and very humid last night and we didn't turn the AC on until very late so it was much too hot for sleeping. Neither of us slept well and I had to be up early as well for my pulmonary function tests.

It turns out that there were five tests they did, all of them measuring my lung volume on inhale and exhale while breathing into a tube thingy. We finished the tests in about fifteen minutes which I gather is fast. They could have repeated the tests, I guess, but apparently my results looked fairly normal to the technician and the student.

When I finished the tests I drove to meet my friend in Milton. I loved meeting her, and I'm so happy that I decided to drive to see her. She is as wonderful in person as online - she's funny and smart and interesting and fun to talk to - and it turns out that we have quite a lot in common. Afterwards, she showed me pictures of her trip to Iceland. I'm so jealous that she went! It's a stark, beautiful country and it sounds like my kind of place. I'd love to go there.

I got home around 1:30pm, had a bath, and slept until Ian got home at 7:30pm. I sleep so much better during the day than at night but I'm so tired that I think I'll be able to sleep soundly tonight. Tomorrow I've got nothing to do and I plan to be lazy the whole day.

A lazy end to the long weekends

Today wound up being a much lazier day than I'd planned to have. I'd thought about cutting out my dress but then I got caught up in Ian's video game. I'm like the girl in that commercial who doesn't know that a video game isn't a movie :)

Seriously, I enjoy watching Ian play an open-world game, where there are quests and stuff. I'm not good at the controls for the games but Ian is good at them and he's patient enough to let me suggest where he should go next. It's like I'm playing the game but without actually playing it. This game has lots of cut scenes and an interesting background story as well.

I did manage to pull us away from the game long enough to take a walk around the neighbourhood. We should have gone earlier or later as it was still pretty hot outside but it was still a nice walk. I thought about going for another walk this evening (I love love love walking outside in the early to late evening) but I was too tired. I didn't sleep well last night so I was extra-tired today; if I'd slept well I definitely would have been out and about this evening. I'm a little stressed with the biopsy coming up on Wednesday.

I was able to pin-fit the bodice top today and after doing that, I added a little bit extra length to the bust to cover it and some other extra length to the center because it was just a little bit low. I'm quite confident that it's going to fit me pretty well. I'm hoping that tomorrow I'll be able to cut out the dress and baste it together. I'd like to try and get that stuff done before the biopsy so that I'm not left with too much to do afterwards.

My pre-op appointment

My back and hips felt pretty good today after yesterday's walk. I did have some pain on my right side while I was driving to my appointment this morning but it went away once I stretched my back a bit. I went for another long (hour and a half) walk today but I used my cane. I don't want to overdo things, after all :)

My appointment this morning was my pre-op stuff for next week's biopsy. Every hospital does their pre-op stuff just a little bit differently, and I have to say that I really liked the way they did things at this hospital. Really, all I had to do was show up at their clinic and the nurse assigned to me brought all the people I needed to see right to the clinic. I had to go from the waiting room to different rooms in the clinic which I much preferred over running around from department to department trying to see people.

We did an EKG first and then the nurse said that she needed to do bloodwork. I asked her if it was at all possible to use my port and - surprise! - she said yes, that she would just call the IV tech people and have one of them do it. It was awesome! They don't do that at my regular hospital. The IV tech inserted and removed the needle a little slower than I like but I'm ok with that if they use my port at all.

Once we got the EKG and bloodwork out of the way, my nurse went through my paperwork with me and we talked about the drugs I take. One of them is Celebrex which I take to control my lower back pain and to help control the sternal pain. It can reduce blood clotting so I was told stop taking it tonight until after the procedure. Going without it might mean extra pain for me for the next week or so... which means that I won't be walking without my cane for a while. There's no point taking chances if I can't deal with the possible pain consequences, after all.

Next I saw the anaesthesiologist. After my success at getting the nurse to use my port for the bloodwork, I figured that it wouldn't hurt to ask the anaesthesiologist if they would be able to use my port for the IV during surgery. I explained that my veins are crap and the port was easier on everyone. The anaesthesiologist told me that it's possible to use the port for that but that they'll need to set up a bigger IV anyways. The big IV needs to be in there for the unlikely event that something goes wrong and I need a blood transfusion.

I don't know what, exactly, my face showed when he said "big IV" but inside I felt scared and my mind said, "eep!" You see, half the time when inserting an IV, the nurses need to use a teeny-tiny needle because my veins are so very bad... and a teeny-tiny needle won't work with a big IV, will it? Seeing my face he was quick to assure me that they could either put me out with gas or with a port IV and then, once I was under, they could put in the big IV. Apparently the anaesthetic is a vasodilator and that makes insertion of the big IV easier (or possible, in my case). He also said that it's fairly common for them to put that IV in after the anaesthetic has taken effect. I'm fine with that; really, as long as they don't put the big IV in while I'm awake, I'm fine with whatever else they do.

The last person I saw was a respiratory therapist. Since this procedure involves the chest cavity they want to be sure that my lungs are tip-top before they go in there. This was all new to me; I've never seen a respiratory therapist before. She first had me do a lung function test with a computerized spirometer that printed out a nifty graph.

Then she needed to do an arterial blood gas test in which blood is drawn from the artery in my wrist and the gases in it are measured. To do this, first she had to find the artery by finding the pulse. She first tried to find the pulse in my right wrist, then went to my left, then back to my right, then back again to my left, and finally was confident that she found it on my right. I know I have a pulse, but it is hard to find exactly :) it's important to find the exact location of the artery a thin needle has to go in and draw blood from the artery. She warned me that would hurt, and it did, and the spot is still sore. I wouldn't have wanted to go through that needle more than once so I appreciate her caution and thoroughness.

And that was it. They'd said that it could take as long as three hours but it only took me about two hours from start to finish and because there were so many different things to do the time flew by. Hopefully things go as smoothly and efficiently next week.

Booked my trip

I've booked my pre-surgery clinic appointment for next Wednesday morning. They say the appointment can take up to three hours so it's a good thing that I don't have anything else to do that morning.

Now that I know when the surgery is and everything, I've booked my flight to see my friends. I had already set aside the dates and made sure I'll have a hotel room but I didn't want to book my flight until the surgery was all set up. We're meeting in Atlantic City the first weekend of June (June 3-6).

There are no flights from Toronto or Waterloo to Atlantic City so the next best thing is to fly into Philly, take the train to downtown Philly, and from there take the regional train to Atlantic City. It sounds a bit cumbersome but it shouldn't be too bad. The worst part will be waiting for connections but the rides themselves should be straightforward. I won't be taking much luggage with me to make everything easier.

I think there must have been some kind of sale going on or something because I managed to get a direct flight return to Philadelphia from Toronto at a great price. The direct flight is only an hour and a half which makes the extra train travel bearable. If I'd had to make a connecting flight the entire trip would be too much, especially since I'll be recovering from surgery. When I'd been checking into flights before, the price for direct flights was way too high. Getting the direct flight cheaper is definitely a bonus.

I'm really excited about this trip even though it'll be so soon after the biopsy. There's a bunch of us getting together to spend time with each other; it's the same group that I've met a few times already. It's been a long time since I last saw them and I've missed them a lot. This trip will be a good, emotionally healing thing for me, I think.