Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Lazy, lazy me

I think I may be the laziest person I know. I've had all this time to do stuff and yet I've done nothing of interest over the last few days. I've done a lot of internet surfing which is sort of interesting to me but not all that interesting to anyone else, I'm sure.

I didn't even go to Meditation yesterday; for some reason I just didn't feel up to it. I was very tired and I slept quite a lot of the day, which worked out just as well for me, I think. I've been trying - and succeeding, as long as I put my alarm clock out of arm's reach - to get up around 9:30am, but it seems like I'm doing less than when I slept until the afternoon.

Of course if I didn't pick up the laptop - or if I put it down after eating breakfast - I might be able to get up off the couch and actually do something. I think part of the problem is that the areas where I want to work are messy and covered with stuff, and I'd have to clean those off to be able to do something. For whatever reason, I'm paralyzed when I think about tidying up that stuff (or anything else that could be tidied).

A lot of the mess is - and this may not surprise you - vintage patterns that haven't been put into envelopes and put away. I haven't bought any new patterns in a while - lately I've been buying fabric but even that is slowing down - so I'm not making any more of a mess. I'm just not dealing with the existing one. I think I'm going to have to grit my teeth and force myself to just put the stuff away.


Amy Lynn said...

I am feeling so much like this right now. I completely identify!

Margaret said...

I so understand the paralysis that can result from too much stuff... It seems so difficult to even start to tackle the stacks sometimes!
Aunt Margaret

manchester fat acceptance said...

yep, i can totally relate too!

i take exception to you calling yourself 'lazy', though. i think a better description would be 'friggin exhausted and overwhelmed from trying to stay healthy, both mentally and emotionally, while ravaged by cancer'... in my opinion.

Chantelle said...

Thanks :) I'll agree that I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted, but I don't know if that's only because of my own cancer. Luckily, my cancer has been stable :).

But a lot of friends have died over the last few months - and some others are doing badly - and I think that my current lethargy might be part of me dealing with that.

Hugs and love,