The pain in my sternum has lessened to the point where I only took Percocet once today. Sigh. It is getting better, but I'm getting tired of the pain. I know, you're all getting tired of me whining :)
I did make it to my young women's support group. It was such a relief to go there; I missed last month's, and I haven't been able to make it to my Spirituality and Healing group for a while. Tonight, as part of a broader focus of the group, we made braided hangers. They look kind of cool when they're done. I think if I were making them all the time, I'd use subtle colours. The clothes do stick to the hangars better because of the braid, though.
One thing we talked about today while I was there was my oncologist. I don't feel all that comfortable with her. I feel like she's not giving me complete and accurate information (for example, when she gives me tumour marker numbers she rounds them down), and I feel like she won't tell me things unless I ask. As well, in my last visit when I was complaining about my tiredness, her first answer was that maybe this was my new normal; that I had to accept that I could only do 20% of what I could do before. Personally, I think that there is no reason at all why I should be this tired and I'm certainly not going to roll over and just accept it. I ended up feeling (and still feel) like my oncologist was kinda dismissing my tiredness or giving up on me. I'm concerned that this is a pattern; that when things are dire, she will give up without searching for new possibilities. I want (and think I deserve) better than that.
I just don't know how to go about finding a new oncologist in my area. I don't want to go back to Mississauga. This could be difficult. Oh - people also suggested that I get a referral to the pain specialist over at the cancer center. We'll see.