Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Grammy Awards 2011 Red Carpet

Warning: image-heavy post ahead

Music award show red carpets are a little different than television or movie award show red carpets. People in music tend to be style risk-takers, because they aren't on the red carpet all that often, and they also tend to have more "normal" body types. They aren't all skinny twigs who wear haute couture sample sizes and they don't all get asked by major designers to wear their clothes. Therefore, the standards by which I judge the Grammy red carpet fashions is different than the standard I use at other times.

I expect people to be a bit wackier, style-wise, than normal. I also expect outfits to be a little tackier - tighter, shinier, shorter, weirder - than I'd expect otherwise. The Grammys are a less formal occasion than other award shows and I expect fashion to reflect that.

That said, let's have a look at what people wore on Sunday night. Where possible I've included the designer but this isn't possible for a lot of dresses. I also normally organize the pictures by dress colour but that didn't really work as well this time around. I thought about organizing them from least wacky to most wacky but that proved to be a challenge, too, because the definition of wacky kept changing! Therefore, the pictures are in random order.


Wow, that's a lot of skin and leopard print. I couldn't find the designer for this dress and I'm not surprised; who would want to own up to this? 

Alicia Arden
Those shoes don't go with this dress. I'm not a fan of the nude-coloured, hidden platform pumps. They make people look like they've got weirdly-deformed clown feet. The belt saves the dress from looking like a towel.

Bonnie McKee
I love the ombre effect on this fabric and I love the bright orange. I just wish it wasn't a mullet dress. And what's up with her sculpted hair?

Ciara in Emilio Pucci
Well, this is... interesting. she looks like she's wearing an upscale beach coverup over her wacky bathing suit. I love the colours. The shoes are all kinds of wrong for this dress. Love her hair and makeup.

Crystal Bowersox in Alberto Makali
This is so sad and droopy... and I'm not just talking about her hair. That left sleeve is bringing this dress down, as is the extra length. I like the beading detail on the bodice but that's it.

Cyndi Lauper
This is practically a mullet dress but even so, I love it. it's edgy and sexy and is probably comfortable. Her hair is its usual crazy self.

Eva La Rue
Short, tight, and shiny - Heidi Klum would love it. At least her arms are covered. It isn't an awful dress... it's just not that great.

Eva Longoria in Ashi Studio
Is that collar supposed to be standing up in the back? It's like this dress was held up by starch and then got caught in a rainstorm and fell down. Lovely hair and makeup but that can't save this look.

Heidi Klum in Julien MacDonald
Long, tight, and shiny - she must be growing up! I like this dress even though I'm not in love with the shoulder cut-outs or slit. Those shoes are way too matchy-matchy for my taste, too. Her hair looks strangely relaxed.

Jada Pinkett-Smith in Amanda Wakely
I didn't recognize her because her face looks so beautiful! She should stop wearing those tight, severe hairstyles because they just don't work for her. I love the dress except for the hem, which is weird. The shoes are wrong, too, with the ankle strap.

Jenna Ushkowitz in Pamela Dennis
What's up with her pose? Is she pigeon-toed?  I kind of like the gauzy, breezy feel of this dress although I don't love the bow at the top of the bodice with the tails hanging down. Keep the bow, lose the tails.

Jennifer Hudson in Versace
She doesn't even look like herself anymore. I like the bodice but it's too small for her and you can tell because she's got four-eyed boobs. The shoes completely ruin any good that could come of the mullet-style skirt.

Jennifer Lopez in Emilio Pucci
Even though she's bringing her own disco ball everywhere she goes, I love this dress. I love that the mirrors are different shapes over her abdomen and sleeves. I even love her matchy-matchy shoes, because if you're wearing something this flashy, only flashy shoes will do. Her long, casual hair is perfect.

Jewel in Pamella Roland
Lacking sparkles and glam, this dress is quite formal. It belongs at the Emmys or Oscars instead of a music award show. Still, she's pregnant and probably doesn't have that much choice in dresses. It's possible that she also wanted to cover up more because she's feeling fat and bloated. I don't know. She's pretty but a wallflower in this dress. And I wish she'd bring her shoulders down from her ears.

Katy Perry in Giorgio Armani
I love love love the fabric in the skirt. It's so ethereal and shiny and gorgeous. It doesn't really go with the mosiac mirrored bra but if you can't make your boobs into disco balls what's the point of having them? And are those wings on her back?

Kelly Osbourne in Tadashi Shoji
This is pretty. The colour suits her, as does her hair and makeup. And she's bringing the sparkle with her shoes.

Kim Kardashian in Kaufmanfranco
The shape of this dress is interesting but it isn't flattering and I'm really not loving the colour on her. I wish the places where the dress is held in place with double-sided tape weren't so obvious.

Lady Gaga in embryo
In case you missed it. lady Gaga incubated in that egg thing. She emerged from it as part of her performance.

Lea Michele in Emilio Pucci
What's up with her pose? Did the world tilt while she was wearing this dress so that her legs showed like that? The skirt on this dress is ok but I'm not loving the bodice with its ruffles and shoulder pads. 

LeAnn Rimes in Reem Acra
I like this dress... sort of. It's flattering on her, or it would be if her hair and makeup didn't look like that. Did she forget her wig?

Lilian Garcia in Nurielle
My eyes! My eyes! This is horrible - her hair, the lace, the hem, the "fringe". There's no way this look can be redeemed.

Nicole Kidman in Jean Paul Gaultier Couture
LOVE. I love the ombre effect, I love the colours, I love the skirt, I love the silhouette, I love the sparkles. I only wish that she'd done something just a bit different with her hair.

Rihanna in Jean Paul Gaultier Couture
You know, I kind of like this dress. I love the way that the lines of ruffles vary in width to emphasize the shoulders and hips and to make the waist and knees look smaller. I think - well, hope - she's wearing a bodysuit underneath even though her bellybutton and nipples are clearly visible. 

Selena Gomez in J. Mendel
LOVE! I love the dress fabric and silhouette and I'm also in love with her hair and makeup. This look is gorgeous.

Selma Blair in Lanvin
It's sad that there aren't many good choices for pregnant ladies to wear on the red carpet. This is a strange dress: it looks like the skirt was originally worn over the navy bodysuit and then someone decided it would be a great idea to attach the skirt over the belly, leaving the boydsuit as-was. The proportions are ok but the line between the skirt and bodice just doesn't work. And the colour, while great on her, is kind of drab.

Ariana Grande in BCBG
Huh. I like this. I like the line that the bodice and sleeve have against the skirt. The skirt is cute, too, although it's a wee bit short. I think I'd love it if the neckline was a bit different, and especially if the left side didn't look like a tank top.The shoes don't work at all and neither does her hair.

Christina Aguilera in Roberto Cavalli
Oh, Christina.This dress is too tight for you and your girls - can you see the way they're trying to escape? I admit that I love the dress with its beading patterns but it just doesn't work for you. The beading creates an hourglass figure and you already have one. And please, please, please, do something different with your hair: it looks dry and shapeless.

Dollphace in Cyndarella Couture
Love the fabric, silhouette, shoes, and hair, except that I think the belly is supposed to be completely covered. It looks like the outfit is just a half-size too small for her, too. 

Esperanza Spalding in Selma Karaca
There's a bit too much going on up at her face what with the hair and collar. I do love her hair and I love the dress fabric and silhouette; they just don't work together. Those shoes don't work at all: they're completely the wrong colour for her and for the dress. They sort of look like high-heeled slippers. 

Florence Welch in Givenchy couture
SQUEEE! I love, love, love this. It's got a concept and it's beautifully executed and it totally works for her.

Genevieve Jackson in Kimberley Kouture
I didn't know that sliip shaper undergarments came in such interesting patterns.

Gram'ma Funk
Why is she wearing a theatre curtain? Does it raise and lower to show more or less leg? I feel for her poor boobs, forced up and out of those teeny little cups.

Gretchen Wilson
What a cute night-on-the-town look! But wait, isn't this the Grammys? Shouldn't she be wearing something a bit more... something?

Hayley Williams in Jeremy Scott
I like that she took a risk but I wish that risk was more flattering on her. The skirt cuts her legs off at their largest part, making them look huge - and they're not huge. The bodice doesn't balance out the skirt or her legs.

Hettie Barnhill in Jovani Couture
I like this. The design is quite flattering and suits her. The design colour also looks a lot like her skin colour, adding a risque element to this look that I love. Unfortunately her hair takes away from this gorgeous dress.

Hillary Scott in Roberto Cavalli
This is kind of a blah dress. The belt doesn't look all that good and I'm not loving the black column with her hair and bangs. 

India Arie
You know, I'm completely in love with the skirt and her jewelry. I think I'd love the overall look if she wasn't wearing the jacket - or if she was wearing a different skirt. Both are too boxy together.

Janelle Monae in Ralph Lauren
I love her look - the skinny pants with the sequinned jacket and structured hair. It's so much her own look and at the same time great for the Grammys.

Julianne Hough in Malandrino
What a fun print! The silhouette looks great, too. It works for the red carpet but I with there was a bit more sparkle.

Karina Nuvo
Bridal. Crappy hair. The pleats are sort of interesting but the overall look is boring.

Kathy Griffin in Oscar de la Renta
What a great dress! it fits her and doesn't show too much. The metallic bits look amazing and I love the metallic piping. It's all her and it looks great.

Miley Cyrus in Roberto Cavalli
Ummm, wow. Why is her hair holding up her dress? This dress is too long for her.

Mya in Jean Fares Couture
I really like this - I'm a big fan of this colour and I love the way the pattern works its way up the dress.

Sara Bareilles in Ghada Paris
This colour is good on her and the overall look is polished and pretty. Still, this dress isn't as flashy as one might expect for the Grammys.

Tacky. Those ridiculous earrings, the matchy-matchy bag and shoes, and those shoulders - terrible.

Tia Carrere
Oh, wow. While the colour is great, the silhouette is just ok. The dead thing over her shoulder detracts from the dress.

Toni Braxton
She's melting into the floor. The bodice is pretty but she has no feet. Great hair and makeup.

Amber Riley in Ema Savahl
What a great dress! It's so slimming, and I love it! But why, oh why, did she put that gold thingy on her shoulder? And what did she do to her hair?

Anna Nalick in Ashi Studio
Oh I love this. I love the nude tulle over the sweetheart neckline and the sleeves and the belt and the full skirt with feather/fringe hem. Perfection, especially with her hairstyle.

Carly Steel
Love the colour but did she have to match her eyeshadow to her dress? I sort of like the colourblocking with the ombre but it also doesn't quite work.

Carolyn Malachi in Jovani Couture
Eh, it's pretty but not really all that exciting. I like the brooch detail on her shoulder and at the waist.

Dee Dee Bridgewater
Um, wow. That leg slit is strange with the halter neck. And are those silver shoes? With an orange dress?

Dianna Agron in Vivienne Westwood
The pleating and ruching on the bodice is interesting but what I really love are her hair and makeup. 

Jordan Sparks in Zang Toi
I think the long skirt is belted on to the short dress and it just looks weird. Her leg looks strange and I don't love the short dress. The white under the red doesn't really work, either.

Keri Hilson in Basil Soda
Gorgeous! The movement on the dress is fantastic and I love the overall look. The colour really works for her, too.

Lalah Hathaway
She's either melting into the floor or being formed from it. The sleeves don't work for her at all. Great colour.

Margaret Cho in John Renaud
The bodice is a touch too big but overall this is a great dress. Love the layering in the skirt.

Martina McBride in Malandrino
What were they thinking when they made that sleeve? I sort of like the skirt with the extra bit added bit the neckline and sleeve don't work so well.

Melanie Fiona in Max Azria
Nice dress with interesting fabric lines. Who told her that this headband was a good idea? 

Miranda Lambert in Edition by George Chakra
Love the dress except for where it looks funny around her waist and hips. Why did she make her hair the height of her forehead? She looks deformed.

Monica in Stephanie Roland
It would be better without the sleeves but otherwise this is a gorgeous dress. Love her hair.

Nadeea in Dolce&Gabbana
It's the leopard dress from the Golden Globes! It works better here even if she's wearing that wig, mismatched gloves, and bag. Altogether this look is crazy.

Natasha Bedingfield in Abed Mahfouz
I didn't know that going to the Grammys was like going to the prom. This is a pretty prom dress that's a bit sheer in the skirt.

Naya Rivera in Ashi Studio
When did she grow a tail? That waist is too high and her hair is too blocky for this look to really work. Love the fabric.

Nicki Minaj in Givenchy
THIS is the way to wear leopard print: all over, from the dress to the leggings to the gloves to the hair. Crazy and amazing.

Pauley Perrette in Terri King
I wouldn't have known that she was at the Grammy awards if she wasn't wearing the notes on her front. The chartreuse colour doesn't nothing for her. At least the dress fits.

Skylar Grey
What's up with the waist ruffle on only the one side? The dress is a little too big on her waist but the overall look works.

Yocon Talie
Oh wow. Those... feathers... are something else. They certainly do move the eye around, don't they? Too bad they're paired with that grey dress that doesn't fit her too well because at least the colour of the feathers looks good on her.

Yolanda Adams
After years of too-long dresses on the red carpet, we get this. The top is gorgeous, as is the ombre, but the mullet hem makes it look like the dress is too short for her. And are those boots suede? Can you say "too heavy" for the dress?

Frida Giannini in Gucci Premiere
Lovely. The colour and silhouette work with her hair and styling perfectly. Love the halter neckline accent.

Paz Vega
This almost works: if the hem were straight it would be perfect because the crystal accents on the neck and sleeves make it interesting and right for the Grammys red carpet.

Faith Evans
The pleating and ruching on the skirt isn't quite flattering. The oversized dolman bodice with the zigzag gives is interesting and works for her.

N'Dambi in Sachin + Babi
Love it! I love the extra texture carried through the entire dress, the silver on the bodice, and the black belt. Even the shoes work perfectly. Gorgeous!!

Adrienne Lau
Well. There's a lot going on here: the super-long cowl, the carwash skirt, the sequins, the hem, the sleeves - and it all adds up to make a weird and wacky dress that isn't particularly flattering on her. That bodice with a straight long skirt would have been spectacular.

Cindy Valentine
What's going on with the hem of this dress? It's not supposed to look that way, is it? And why is she wearing shiny gloves and suede boots? The neckline is pretty but that's all that this dress has going for it.

Mayra Veronica in Herve Leger
There's nothing exciting about this dress... but there's nothing horrible about it either. It's a safe choice.

Kristine Elezaj in Atelier Pavoni
She looks like she's developed fins on the bottom of her skirt. The bodice is pretty and flattering but seeing someone wearing a nude colour like this with blonde hair makes her look washed out.

Nadia Ali in Jovani Couture
This reminds me of that look that Halle Berry wore when she won her Oscar. Except that this has feathers on the skirt and more obvious breast coverage. The skirt is a little overpowering.

Giuliana Rancic in Randi Rahm
Pretty, if a bit bland. I like the red belt and the skirt because they're interesting but the rest of the look - including her hair - is a bit ho-hum. Perfect for someone who interviews other celebrities because she won't outshine them in this.


manchester fat acceptance said...

BRILLIANT commentary, as usual. you had me rofling with the lulz!

ooooh i love Anna Nalick's dress! i'm seeing a real Black Swan influence there. i wonder if we'll see more and more of that as designers take advantage of the hype?

i also really liked Mya's dress quite a lot. so graceful and elegant.

and Martina McBride's sleeve made me throw up in my mouth a little...

thanks for this post of insightful hilarity.


Allison said...

I love Anna Nalick's dress too... I think it perfectly fits in with the kooky aspect of the Grammy's without being at all revealing, yet neither looking stuffy and with a really unusual silhouette for the red carpet. I love that 50s vibe to it, but it's definitely a modern dress!

Eduardo Alfman said...

Somebody can tell me, Why I can't find Christina Aguilera's pics in the Red Carpet?? :'(

Chantelle said...

Eduardo, I'm not sure why you couldn't see the Christina Aguilera pic. The photo I linked to was huge so I've linked to a different photo of her in hopes that this will fix the problem.


wholesale Clothing said...

All dress are gorgeous.