Friday, November 23, 2007

Continued from yesterday

This fall I've taken on more things than I'd taken on since I was working. Previously, I've had Well-Fit, curling once or twice a week in the winter, and bellydancing in the summer. This fall, I'm curling AND bellydancing (and I was taking swimming lessons, but I've dropped those). I'm busy every weeknight except for Tuesday, and on Wednesdays and Thursdays I have at least two activities back-to-back. So yeah, I guess this is a little much. I sleep about 12-13 hours a day fairly consistently. If I get up early one day, I'll have to sleep in extra another day to get all those hours of sleep.

I didn't think it would be too much for me because I do love doing all of these things, but I put the "too much" line in the wrong place. Still, it's only a few more weeks that I have all of these things to do and then my activities will settle down.

I do sort of wonder whether increasing my anti-depressants is the right thing to do right now. Since I had my big meltdown, I've been working on trying to see the smaller picture in front of me instead of trying to fit the entire overwhelming big picture. This step has helped me to keep things manageable and I've been feeling better as a result.

And yes, I've been crying when other people might not. I don't really see that there's anything weird about that, as crying is one of the ways that I deal with things. I almost always feel better after a good cry. I can't make my life stress-free so I'm going to need to deal with the stress. To me, antidepressants are only one of the tools in my toolkit. I'm hoping to explore some of the other ways of coping with stress over the next while.

Thank you all for your love and words of support! These help me feel protected and safe and ready to try new coping mechanisms.

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