Thursday, November 06, 2008

The fantasy of walking away and starting over

We were watching a tv show where the main character just walks away from his life. He meets a girl and travels with her without telling anyone where he is or where he's going.

Part of me would love to live that kind of life, moving from place to place whenever I felt like it and never really having responsibilities. I always used to say that I wanted someone to pay me just to sit in a room and be me and do what I like - giving everything up to live a paid, no strings nomadic life would definitely fall into that life (so does being on long-term disability, come to think of it). I could definitely get used to freely moving from one place to another.

At different times in my life, I've also very much wanted to just walk away and start over. Not that I've ever wanted to leave my family or loved ones, but there's something appealing about being able to go somewhere else where no one knows me and reinvent myself. Intellectually, I know that this wouldn't work, because wherever you go, there you are - in other words, you can never escape yourself so you're likely to make the same kinds of mistakes that you made before. That said, there's something about the idea that a person could just walk away and start over and have a good life.

Don't get me wrong - I love the person I am and the life I have..... but who doesn't love the idea of a little irresponsibility and reinvention sometimes?


sloth003 said...

I'm with ya.

manchester fat acceptance said...

getting married did that for me in some ways... like a clean slate with a new name. and i don't tend to keep old contacts for long, although facebook has uncovered my disguise a bit!


Robin said...

OMG I almost fell out of my chair! That is all exactly what I wanted to do! Except I couldn't leave the boys at this age. I have fantasized about just going from place to place until I feel I'm Done, then moving on. As willing as my guy would be to come with me, it's something I imagine I'd do alone.

Love you,

Anonymous said...

It is interesting how many people feel the same way. A friend of mine is a little more severe and wants to give everything away to live in the mountains away from everything and everyone.