Almost normal

I woke up at 1pm and finally felt like a normal person. Yay! I guess that the Pamidronate in combination with everything else that's been going on knocked me out. I probably needed sleep anyways and my body made sure that I took it.

I didn't go curling today, though. I've gained weight and I need larger pants to wear at curling. As well, for all that I'm awake, I didn't want to do too much today. So I puttered around doing stuff instead.

My friend has been admitted to the hospital. I talked to her this evening and I plan to visit her this weekend if the roads are good. Ian thinks the roads will be fine tomorrow so we'll probably go then. I think it would do me and my friend some good if I saw her as she's having a hard time now.

This is like the flu

I slept a lot yesterday - in fact, I was asleep for most of the day and through the night. I fell asleep on the couch and didn't wake up when Ian got home. I woke up as Ian was getting ready to leave for work this morning and went right back to sleep. I woke up again at 7pm and expect to be going to bed soon.

I guess this is the "flu-like" symptoms people can get after the first Pamidronate. My eyes hurt when I move them, I have a terrible headache, and my muscles are stiff. And I'm sleeping like a sick person. I hope that I feel better tomorrow because I'd like to go curling. Also, a friend of mine in Oshawa is not doing well and I might want to go there to see her. I'm worried that she's in dire straits because her liver seems to be failing.

My first Pamidronate injection

I had my first Pamidronate injection today. This isn't that much of a change in treatment; the Pamidronate replaces the clodronate that I was supposed to be taking before. The clodronate is a drug that's taken orally on an empty stomach twice a day and the Pamidronate is given by IV once a month. I wasn't able to take the clodronate properly because I wasn't always awake enough hours, so it wasn't doing me as much good as it should have. At least I'll have protection from the Pamidronate.

I re-discovered that I have terrible veins during the bloodwork and injection process today. I knew that my veins were bad, but they seemed to be worse than I remembered. During bloodwork, the nurse got a vein in my hand but it hurt - as all the veins in my hands do - so she took it out. There were no other good veins in my hand and she asked for warm blankets to be sent, which would have delayed the test results. The nurse ended up going in to the same vein.

Later on, when the nurse was setting up the line for the Pamidronate, the first injection in my forearm didn't work as she went through the vein and the saline built up beneath my skin. So she took that out and had to find another vein. It seems that I'm retaining water, which is making veins hard to find, but she finally was able to get the IV started. The IV is weird; it's a needle that's used to put a tube into the vein, and then the needle is removed. The tube remains and the Pamidronate is delivered through that tube.

When the Pamidronate was flowing well enough, the injection site started to hurt occasionally. They put a warming blanket on my arm and that helped; I guess my veins don't like the delivery system when they're cold. I also had pain when they were flushing saline through at the end - the solution and my arm were both cold and the warming blanket wasn't warm anymore.

So after all of these troubles, the nurse and I decided that it is time to put a port-a-cath in. They can draw blood and give the Pamidronate (and chemo, when it comes to that) through the port without having to worry about my veins. Inserting the port is a day procedure that takes about 1/2 a day and takes about 10 days to heal. I'll let you know when that's scheduled.

One of the side effects of the first Pamidronate injection can be flu-like symptoms. I'm definitely feeling under the weather now and I slept for a good part of the day. My arm is also quite tender. I'll be taking it easy tomorrow and maybe Friday as well.

Home now

I made it home, safe and sound. The flights were pretty uneventful; I slept all the way to Calgary (I think I may have been talking in my sleep) and I had the row to myself on the way to Waterloo.

Of course I still miss my dad, and as I got further away from Edmonton, it seemed to hit me pretty hard that my dad was dead. It's a good thing I had that row all to myself as my face and neck were covered in tears for a good part of the way.

I miss my mom very much as well; I appreciated being able to stay there and I liked staying with my mom so I found it hard to leave. I know it was time... but still, part of me wanted to stay. I left a bunch of things behind so there is a little piece of me still there :). I hope to see you all in Edmonton soon.

Leaving tomorrow

I'm going back to Waterloo tomorrow. As much as I like being here, helping out my mom and stuff, there comes a point where I have to go back to my regularly scheduled life. And I would like to see Ian as I've missed him. I'm not sure how much I'll feel like doing when I first get home. I have all sorts of activities I could do (and an appointment on the 27th) but I might want to just cocoon myself at home for a bit.

I saw my sister this evening - just the two of us - for a while. I wish I'd been able to see her longer as we had a really good visit and I would have liked to have talked to her more. At least I did get to see her :)

I'll miss my mom a lot when I leave. I know that everyone needs their own time and place to grieve and although I've been able to help with some stuff, I think that it will be sort of easier for my mom if she's on her own. I'm so proud of her because I think that she's been very courageous in getting through this difficult time. I love that she is putting one foot in front of the other and getting through things - I know how hard that can be to do, and I love that she's doing it. I appreciate that I was able to stay with my mom and I hope I was able to help a bit with things.

The Academy Awards

The Academy Awards were on tonight and we settled in and watched the entire ceremony. I don't care that much about the awards themselves because the movies that I think should win rarely do, but I always like looking at the clothes. :)

This year there were many, many red gowns at the ceremony. I'd say that about half of the women presenting or receiving awards were wearing red - that's a lot, considering that the remaining half were wearing every other colour of the rainbow. Helen Mirren was wearing a particularly lovely gown; it was a strapless red gown with tucks and pleats radiating down from one side, and it had a built-in sparkly shrug with elbow-length sleeves. The shrug looked elegant and covered her upper arms beautifully without competing with or detracting from the dress. And who doesn't love a little sparkle? :)

The ladies on stage who were guiding the award receivers were wearing beautiful gowns, too. One gown was gold and the other silver and both were gorgeous.

This isn't to say that every gown was beautiful. Most were, of course :) However.... I thought that the dress Anne Hathaway was wearing looked a little strange, especially in the back. I think it would have looked better if the flower line had either stopped at the empire waist line or it had continued down the dress to her high hip. That line's placement looked strange and I thought it didn't work so well with the shoulder of her dress on that side. It might have been better to put the strap and flower line on different shoulders, or had them combine, or not had a draped shoulder. The back of the dress also looked odd; it looked like the flower lines should have met at a point in the mid-back but then they decided to raise the back. The back dress line that cut the flower line looked out of place.

Anyways - I enjoyed the evening very much. I'm looking forward to seeing the dresses in upcoming magazines :)

Oscar movies

We tried to watch Atonement tonight and gave up halfway through. It's supposed to be a great movie and it's up for a Best Picture Oscar award, but we couldn't sit through it. I had a hard time following the time transitions and the flashbacks confused me. I also didn't understand what was happening or when things were taking place. Once I read a detailed summary, I understood the movie much better but I felt that the movie should stand on its own.

After that, we watched Gone Baby Gone. It is also up for Best Picture and we thought it was better than Atonement. The story kept unraveling, which was interesting. I didn't much like the ending because the character's actions seemed incomprehensible to me. That character was not really developed well - there was no motivation for his actions throughout - and that made the ending difficult to understand and like.

My mom and I are both looking forward to watching the red carpet pre-show and the Academy Awards on Sunday. It's going to be quite a treat :)

Spring '08 summaries

Thanks to those of you who gave me some reassurance about the way I'm grieving. I'm beginning to think that I may have grown up a bit since I last experienced much grief. That, and I have many more tools in my toolkit to help me deal with it.

I've been asked to give a summary of current runway clothes - which is the Fall '08 season - and I still need to look at the collections to do the summarize. In the meantime, I thought I'd offer up my summary of the Spring '08 season for women. This season seems to be less about shape and more about colours and patterns.

Clothes

• the dress reigns supreme. Whichever colour scheme or style you want, you'll find a dress. There are still a lot of sheaths, trapeze dresses, shirtdresses, long dresses, flowy dresses, drapey dresses, lots of folding and gathering
• things made out of jersey and other fabrics that are drapey.
  
• wide-leg jeans
• waists are still going up. High-waisted pants and skirts are in for people other than me
• vests
• blouses - many are romantic
• tunics are still around
  

Accessories

• belts - on everything. Put them over a dress or a tunic. Skinny belts, wide belts, you name it. Most are black or natural colours. Some white and metallics are to be expected.
• big clutches - still. They came in for Fall '07 and they're still around, although they're less shiny and more patent
• big bags - in bright colours. These aren't quite as big as a few seasons ago, but you can still carry a big part of your life in them
  
• big sunglasses

Shoes

• gladiator sandals/stilettos/wedges - if you can cage your feet in it or lace it up your leg, that's good
• platforms
• ballet flats - especially Mary Jane-types with a strap over the instep
  
• wedges - sigh. And here I thought they were leaving. They're still around, but they are tending to be more natural fibres in the wedge than before
  
• peep-toed booties - sigh. I didn't much like the booties (an oxford shoe with a stiletto heel) before, although I'm getting used to them. Putting a tiny peep-toe in them looks strange to me.
• stacked wooden heels/platforms, as well as cork heels
  

Colours and patterns

• bright, saturated colours - bright yellow, orange, cherry red, royal blue, fuschia, kelly green - with almost a patent leather look/feel to them. Most often found in accessories, not clothes, although some clothes will be these colours. These colours are found in the floral prints, below. Pair with black.
• black and white together
• metallics - silver, gold, and copper - are still popular
• nude colours are still around.
• flowers - yes, flowers. Mostly on dresses, and in all sizes, from the small calicoes to big flowers. In all colours as well. There will be a lot of flowers.
  
• stripes - there are some nautical influences here, and the stripes are mainly horizontal. I read somewhere that narrow horizontal stripes are slimming. Huh?
• "painterly" patterns - soft washes of colour. Ombres, dip dyes, and ikats are examples of these patterns.
• ruffles, gathering, ruching, and some origami are still around - but not used as heavily with the flowered patterns.

I think that's it for the highlights. I'll take a look and see if I can come up with something cohesive for Fall '08.

Enough, too little, or too much?

My mom and sister made a duct-tape dummy for me. Once I get it home, I'll stuff it and I'll be able to use it as a dress form. I hope that by having this dress form with my shape, I'll be able to make better changes and drape things more accurately than I can right now. The process took about 2 hours and we had a lot of fun :) We took a couple of pictures during the process that you can see here.

I also saw Step Up 2 the Streets tonight with my niece. It was a fun movie with lots of dancing. I'm a sucker for a movie with lots of dancing. I wish that they'd had crews like that when I was growing up, although I suspecdt that I was too headstrong to work with people in developing a choreography. Anyways, watching the movie is not a bad way to spend a couple of hours.

Sometimes I feel like nothing has changed; that my dad is just away and he'll be right back. Other times, of course, I get very sad and remember that he is gone. I don't cry all the time, either, and I'm not always in danger of crying like I was a few days ago. It seems that if I'm around other people, things are almost normal... it's only when I'm alone that I realize that things are different than they were and even then, this doesn't happen all the time.

I don't have that much experience with death or grieving, but I'm pretty sure that in the past, I'd be a lot sadder for more of the time than I am now. I worry that this might be an effect of my anti-depressants - that they've dulled my emotions so much that I'm not realizing or feeling the true depth of my emotions. I don't want that to happen. I suppose it could be that I'm better at recognizing and dealing with my feelings so that they don't have to overwhelm me all the time, too - all that counseling and support groups had to have been good for something :)

I wish I knew how to figure out if the antidepressant is interfering too much with my emotions. Not that I mind not being in the depths of grief all the time. I guess I'm also worried that if I'm not sad or remembering my dad that I've let part of him go already and I'm not sure that I'm ready to do that.

Emotions are so complicated.

I'd like to pause the world, now, please

When something devastating happens to me, I feel like the world should just stop turning - that everything should freeze in place - until I've dealt with that thing that happened.

When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer back in 2000, the day I first met with the doctors was a perfect fall day. The sky was deep blue and the leaves were red, orange, and golden; the air was crisp and the sun was warm. I had a hard time believing that I could receive so much bad news on that one glorious day.

I feel kind of like that now. I'm amazed that people are just carrying on with their lives and that things are still happening. I know this is selfish, but I don't know how almost everyone else can keep going and live their lives when my dad has died and I feel so empty. I just want to withdraw and lick my wounds. I know I can't stay hidden away forever, though - not just because the world does go on and I'm a part of it, but because I have to get used to the fact that things are different now with my dad gone.

I know that I'm starting to heal a tiny bit when I can go out and be amongst people. Today my sister and her daughter and I went out to a fabric store. The store played easy-listening music and every time a song about loss came on I was reminded of the fact that my dad is gone.

I don't know how anyone else reacts in this sort of situation, but right now when I say that I'm reminded of my loss, what's happening is that I am flooded with sensory memories: I can see what happened and the smells and sounds come back and whatever I felt then pours over me, intensifying the ache I'm already feeling. It's an overwhelming experience at.

Today, instead of trying to shut off the radio (or screaming to block it out or running from the store), I'd stop what I was doing and just stand there aching for my dad while trying not to cry. I guess this is some kind of progress.... but it'll be a while before I'm healed enough so that I don't experience this sensory overload. Or have to fight the urge to cry.

Dealing with grief

Ian left today. He'd planned on leaving on February 14 but since my dad died the day before, he stayed an extra couple of days to be sure that I was ok. Ian is my rock and when I'm upset I rely heavily on him. I'm so glad that he could stay with us as he was able to help out with some of the practical things to do after someone dies. I miss him now that he's gone.... but I don't miss him nearly as much as I miss my dad :(

I'm not very good with death or grieving, but then I guess not many people are. I admire those that can work in an ICU or in hospice with people who are dying because I could not possibly do it. Right now, I'm a little puddle of loneliness and grief during and after and it's all I can do to get through the days.

One thing that I find helps me is to physically write down my memories and what I'm feeling. I'd tried to do this in another completely private online blog but that wasn't as good for me - it seems that I have to physically write my feelings. I find that it helps to get the memories out of my head. So often when I'm overcome with grief it's because I have these waves of memories washing over me. I end up feeling like I'm drowning in these memories. Writing them down helps me get them out of my head - I can still think about them, but they aren't clamoring for attention, you know?

Even so, my grief for my dad isn't going to just go away. He's part of me and his death has left a gaping raw-edged hole where he used to be. It will be a long time before I can think of anything related to him without it hurting and making me cry.

One other thing I've found is that it's easy for me to turn hurt into something else like, say, anger. So here is a small rant: I'm completely shocked and appalled at how expensive it is to die. The obituaries alone cost about $200 per paper per day. That's ridiculous! The death certificate costs $50, and then there are all the fees associated with changing things over to the survivors. My dad's body was donated directly to the University of Alberta's Division of Anatomy where he will help budding physicians, so we don't have to pay for cremation or burial. But if we'd had a service it would cost even more - it's crazy! I feel like these corporations and government offices are taking advantage of people at one of the most difficult points in their lives. (ok, rant over)

My dad

My dad died today at about 5:25pm MST. I am so sad :( I miss my dad so much already.

I haven't been blogging because of things here. Following is what happened with my dad.

We had come to Edmonton last week because my dad was having surgery on Friday, February 8. He had his femoral arteries replaced with artificial ones all the way from his aorta to his groin. He needed the surgery because he had no circulation in his feet and without this surgery, his feet would have had to be amputated eventually.

The surgery was very, very risky because my dad's heart was not good and he had hardening or blockage in all of his arteries. It's a risky surgery anyways - according to one of the doctors, it's about the biggest surgery they do - and normally 5-7% of patients die after it. My dad was given about a 50% chance of living after the surgery, which weren't good odds but my dad wanted to go ahead with it anyway.

The surgery itself went very well and my dad did have circulation in his feet. On Saturday, my dad was awake and lucid and we talked to him. That night he started to become very confused and disoriented. He pulled out some tubes as well and threatened the nurses. They restrained him then so that he couldn't do those things any more.

From then to yesterday, my dad became less and less responsive and was very unsettled. They finally got him settled down with painkillers, but during this time the heart damage was continuing - it never stopped. They also thought that he had pneumonia.

By this morning, my dad was completely unresponsive and his kidneys and lungs were starting to fail. His heart was still being damaged - it seems as though he'd been having a heart attack for five straight days. My dad was also on maximal life support and the best they could get him to was stable; his condition never improved.

My dad didn't want to be on life support if there was no chance of reasonable quality of life, so in accordance with his wishes, we had all the meds and almost all of the tubes (except the painkillers) removed.

He died about two hours later. We were with him up until the end, crying, talking, laughing, and remembering him. He was very peaceful when he died and there was no struggle. We were grateful to have been there with him at the end.

The people at the hospital were amazingly helpful to us during all of this. They gave us a private room in which we could set up camp. They were kind and beautiful and they made the administrative process easier. They made a terrible thing bearable.

Donations to the Heart and Stroke Foundation of Canada can be made in his name, Craig James.

Rest in peace, Pere. I miss you.

I want to make things

It is some kind of cold here in Edmonton! Between that and the change in altitude, I'm really tired. At least I've been sleeping. :) I'm hoping while I'm here to maybe find a bellydance studio that accepts drop-in students so that I can keep up some of my dancing. I'm going to wait on that for a little while, though.

I have almost all of my beads here in Edmonton (funny, at the Waterloo airport I watched them search my suitcase because of all of the little bits of metal in that bag) and I've pulled them out this evening. I'm hoping to create some new pieces as I've been itching to really make things. This happened when I took all those new background photos for the earrings - I realized that I loved making things and I wanted to be able to make more things. It's a vicious cycle, I tell you :)

Anyways, I'm hoping that I'll make some things while I'm here. I'm also hoping to edit my current items for sale with the new photos! I'll let you know when I do that, though - if you were to have put any of those items in your cart before I edit them, then you will have to remove and re-add the items when I'm finished editing in order to actually purchase your items. It's a little "quirk of etsy's.

Made it!

We made it to Edmonton! Our cab was 45 minutes late picking us up to go to the airport and it took two hours to get there, but that was ok because our flight was dealyed about an hour and a half as well. Once we started traveling, everything worked out well. It was just getting going that was the problem.

This afternoon we watched American Gangster. It was pretty good, although we felt that it was long and we didn't always understand what the minor characters were doing. The ending was good but felt shorter than the rest of the film. Not that this was all bad :) It is a good movie and we would recommend that you see it, if you have some time on your hands.

Winter traveling woes

Ian and I were supposed to be flying to Edmonton tonight. We had planned to fly on Westjet out of the Kitchener-Waterloo airport, which is much closer than Toronto.

Traveling in winter can be unpredictable here because we get wicked storms here; flights can be delayed or canceled depending on what's going on. We had a ginormous storm come through today and this evening. Roads are closed all over the place and there are accidents everywhere. There was snow, rain, ice pellets, and freezing rain. As a result, the plane on which we were supposed to leave tonight couldn't land and was diverted to Hamilton, so our flight was canceled.

The Westjet people were very helpful. They booked another flight for us (which wound up on the wrong day, but we've just called and corrected it) to leave Toronto at 7:15am tomorrow. Westjet also arranged and paid for us to take a taxi home from the KW airport and gave us a taxi chit for the cab to Toronto tomorrow morning.

I know that not everyone was happy with how things went, but I have to say that I thought that Westjet handled everything very well. Within 45 minutes of the plane being canceled, everyone had worked out an alternate plan and taxis were on their way. And when we had to call and change the re-booking, the person was super-nice and helpful even though they're crazy busy because of the weather.

I highly recommend you fly Westjet if you can choose to over the other airline. Even though the weather makes traveling suck, Westjet makes it suck less.

My new oncologist

I saw my new oncologist today. I love her. She is so, so, so much better than my old oncologist! She is honest and open and willing to tell me things and just everything that I could hope for in an oncologist.

I'm going to see her every 2 months for now, we'll do tumour markers and other bloodwork before those two months, and I'll be going onto the Pamidronate instead of clodronate (the IV form of a bisphosphonate instead of the oral form). Although I have the littlest cataract in my left eye, since the Femara is working enough. And she will do scans every year, starting with this summer.

Her nurse even offered to put me in touch with the social worker. This is awesome!!!

I did find out something that made me quite angry. Apparently the her2/neu test for my recurrence was inconclusive and my old oncologist was going to order a more specific (FISH) test. My old oncologist never told me about this. Her2 status has a lot to do with treatment and is sort of linked with how aggressive a cancer is, and there's a particular chemo (herceptin) that is prescribed to treat it. If my cancer is her2 positive then I'll receive herceptin whenever I start chemo. We won't give it to me until then.

Her2 status is as important an indicator of cancer as the cancer's hormonal status, and my old oncologist didn't tell me that there was anything going on. We don't know if she ordered the additional test or whether she got results. I'm shocked and upset.

I definitely feel like I made the right decision to leave my old oncologist. This new finding cements my feeling that she was keeping things from me and that I couldn't trust her. But I love love love love love my new oncologist and at least I have made the switch!

Oncology tomorrow

I guess I needed sleep because I slept until almost 4pm again today. That didn't leave much time for photos, but I've managed to take a few today. I'm not going to edit them today, of course - I'm just trying to get all of the photos done.

One of my online friends suddenly developed brain mets. I'm so shocked - she had been normal until her last post last week. Apparently she had trouble thinking and talking andI guess it happened pretty quickly. Hopefully that isn't in my cards; brain mets scare me because the person's personality and cognitive ability can change. Of course most people with brain mets do really well as the treatments are quite effective.

I'd almost forgotten that I have cancer over the last little while - between this and my oncology appointment tomorrow, I remember quite clearly that I do have cancer. I have heard really good things about this oncologist and I hope they're all true. I'll let you know how it goes.

Superbowl Sunday

We went over to our friends' house for their annual Superbowl party. I'm not much of a football fan but I enjoy watching the big games, especially if I get to watch them with friends. There was very yummy chili in mild, medium, and hot variants, yummy vegetables, a cheese fountain, and assorted desserts. My friends put on a very nice spread, making the evening a lot of fun - thanks!

The game itself was great in the first and fourth quarters and kind of boring in the second and third quarters. The game was very close with a final score of 17-14 for the New York Giants.

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers played a great half-time set; all of their songs were recognizable and there was no danger of a wardrobe malfunction - not that anyone would have wanted to see that with Tom Petty. It's amazing how quickly they set up and tear down the stage! I sort of wonder whether the show impacts the second half of the game, but I don't know how much the grass/turf will have changed and how much, if any, it would affect the game. It's not like curling, after all - put a stage over curling for a half-time show and the ice will be very different in the second half of the game :)

I do wish that we got a pure US feed for the game because here in Canada, we don't get the good ads; we get lame Canadian ads, and not all of them are new. I'm sorry, but the US has better Superbowl ads, and I'd like to see them in the context of the game, you know? We'll end up watching them later somehow but it won't be quite the same.

Overall, it was a fun evening; we watched a great game, talked to people we knew, played other games, and ate like royalty. I'm glad we went :)

More and more photos and a movie

I'm still working on photos for my jewelry - I got some more cardstock and took some more pictures today. This time I took photos of eight different pairs of earrings that are both light, dark, and combinations of light and dark, so I should have a good idea of what will work once I've edited all the photos. I'll be very happy once I'm only taking pictures on a few backgrounds :)

This evening we watched 28 Weeks Later. I thought it was nowhere near as good as 28 Days Later. The characters did some really stupid things and so I couldn't empathize with them as well as I usually do. Yeah, I know, horror movie characters are supposed to do stupid things, but they didn't do that in 28 Days Later or in some of the other movies we've watched. Even the stupid actions in Cloverfield were sort of understandable. The ones in 28 Weeks Later couldn't be adequately explained rationally or emotionally so I ended up thinking it was sort of silly in parts. It was sort of an interesting story. This movie is quite gory, so be forewarned, but it's not that scary; I hardly jumped at all and there was no danger that I'd dissolve in a puddle of fear while watching it.

Ian liked the movie because It was gory and had lots of action and it had an ok story. Maybe if I was in a different mood (as in, able to ignore the stuff I didn't like so much) I might have liked it as much as Ian did. I will admit that there were some good and interesting scenes, and I particularly liked the ending.

I'd say that 28 Weeks Later is good enough to see as a rental.

A fine dinner

Sorry about the lack of a blog entry yesterday. I fell asleep around 7pm and stayed asleep most of the night.

Tonight a group of 10 of us went out for a "non-dress-down" dinner, where we wanted people to not wear t-shirts and jeans. Everyone dressed up a bit and looked nice which was good to see.

I didn't finish my dress in time for tonight but that's ok. Instead, I wore a knee-length black pencil skirt and a black belt overtop a stretch black short-sleeved blouse with white polka-dots, along with black nylons and black patent heels. I looked awesome, if I do say so myself :) I might have looked nice in the dress I'm making, too, but I wouldn't have looked as curvy.

We had dinner at Wildcraft, a newish restaurant here in Waterloo. Dinner was very good; I had walnut-crusted chicken which was tasty. For dessert I had the peanut butter cookie which was divine - it was very, very, very yummy. Some people ordered the hazelnut chocolate mousse cake but it wasn't as good as the peanut butter cookie.

We really enjoyed ourselves tonight; I was glad to see everyone and spend time with them over a nice meal. Now I'm stuffed, sleepy, and satiated.